I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize