You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
