For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
