I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize