Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I deserve this hangover.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
