Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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