Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
My cat gives me a boner
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
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