He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I want to fling myself into the sun
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize