It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
