Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Randomize
