love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Randomize
