I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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