member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
