Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
