I seem to have left my pride at pride
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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