Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
The feeling are messing with the penis
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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