How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
