Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I pour the whiskey from now on
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
