So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
