whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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