is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
His hands were made for my vagina.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize