Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize