I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
