I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
