If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
