I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
