we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
