the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
