Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
