Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
