I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
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