Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
