It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
