So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
