Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
