they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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