just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
