shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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