ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize