at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Randomize
