i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
