he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Randomize
