He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Randomize
