if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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