Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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