Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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