I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize