im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
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