when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Randomize
