I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
